Baby's story
8:37 PM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 3 comments

 I journeyed to India alone in search for a cure for the stage four cancer I have. My search landed me in Hyderabad at the end of May 2011. I was physically ill and exhausted. My stay was to last for 50 days at an Ayurvedic clinic. I had never been to India before though I have traveled extensively. I had spoken at length with a woman who travels to this clinic, on an annual basis, so I was as well prepared as I could have been. 

What I could have never prepared for was the 107-112 degree temperatures or the stray dog problem!

My first day at the clinic I noticed a very skinny, one eyed female dog laying in the dirt in front of the Mondir. She seemed lifeless which wasn't terribly concerning since it was so darn hot. Later that day I noticed she had moved to the tile just beyond the dirt and she was convulsing. It was apparent she had had many litters of pups. I watched her for several days and became worried that she was dying. NO ONE else seemed to notice much less care. When I asked one of the clinic owners about the dog I got my first of many lessons in the cultural beliefs about the stray dogs. I was told to pay no attention they are strays and have rabies. If I left them alone I would be fine. I started asking the other patients, many of which were also Americans, about the dogs since many of them had been to the clinic multiple times. They started to educate me on the millions of strays in India, the treatment of them, how the culture as a whole approaches the problem and their beliefs about how this could have happened. The more I learned the more horrified I became. When I would ask a staff member about the dogs they would say they were dangerous, change the subject or tell me to ignore the dogs. 

I could not ignore a dying dog. My family has two dogs and they are both two of the most delightful creatures on our planet. They are a HUGE part of our family. One of my fellow American patients (Kate) and I started feeding this one eyed dog that we started referring to as Baby, for the lack of a better name. We tried initially to do this so the family who owned the clinic wouldn't see that she was being fed as we were very clear they did not like the street dogs. Within a few weeks when we returned from our treatments she started to greet us as we got out of the car. This was the time we normally gave her food, when none of the family was around. I started talking to her and soon attempted to pet her. The first time I put my hand in front of her nose so she could smell me she bent her head down and I knew we were going to be friends. She started to greet the car wagging her tail. Kate and I were delighted to see her come back to life before our eyes. Kate managed to get one of the staff to cook rice and eggs for Baby without the family finding out. We were pleased to have the help as our leftovers weren't enough and often she wouldn't eat them.

As Baby was coming to life I witnessed the plight of the street dogs first hand. I experienced my first nightmare! I watched packs of men brandishing sticks walk through this "gated" community in search of stray dogs to beat to death. I listened from my treatment bed to dogs crying in agony as they were being beaten and were unable to escape. NOTHING in my life could have prepared me for this atrocity. In my country such a thing would create public outcry, prompt police involvement, jail, fines, media attention and an outpouring of families to adopt the innocent abused dogs. I went to the family after my first experience of hearing a dog being beaten and told them they needed to do something about the dogs being beaten, that this is awful and should not be allowed. They were the ones that informed me that it was illegal to beat the dogs and it was ignorant people that were doing it. I informed them that I didn't care who was doing it that it needed to stop. I let them know I couldn't get well listening to animals being tortured. They said nothing. When I approached my fellow patients about the beatings they agreed that it was awful but had seen it so much they to had gotten used to it. A few of them tried to suggest it was none of my business as I was a visitor in their country.... the old adage "When in Rome" someone suggested to me.

What became very clear to me within a short time was there was no way I could socialize Baby and then leave her in the streets of India. I started researching what I needed to do to get her home with me when I left. At this point my second nightmare began. I didn't have an Indian phone. My only access was in the clinic where the family worked so I was limited to trying to find a vet between 2-4pm. It became apparent quickly I wasn't going to accomplish anything this way. I had been telling friends at home about Baby and posting her picture on FaceBook and one of my friends said "I have an employee from India would you like me to see if he could help?" My friend and her employee were life savers! The employee, miraculously, once lived in Hyderabad and has a cousin still there. He (bless him) located a vet for me and after several attempts and phone calls managed to get the Vet to come to the clinic. Much to my surprise the Vet seemed afraid of Baby. He questioned me for about 20 minutes about Baby. "Did I know she was a street dog? How long has she been here? Why did I want to take a street dog home? Have you touched her? Why did I want to take a street dog home? Many have rabies. Do you have dogs at home? Why did I want to take a street dog home?" On and On it went.... Clearly, even he thought I was nuts! Finally he said he would vaccinate her if she was leashed and muzzled with the leash wrapped through an iron gate and held by a man. Baby was a VERY good girl. She sat very still as I held her head in my hands telling her she was going to be okay. She gave a small cry when the first needle went in and then sat quietly till he was done. The Vet then requested we not let her loose until he could move away so she wouldn't bite him when she was freed. I was absolutely ASTONISHED at his request. He had been trained to work with dogs but the cultural hysteria had affected even him. When Baby was set loose she shook and walked over to her hole in the dirt and lay down! I made an attempt to educate the Vet about what rabid dogs look and act like. It most assuredly wasn't what Baby was acting like. Baby got sick from the shots and wouldn't eat for several days. I grew concerned and noticed she had an open wound that looked infected. I had to call the Vet. He came back to the clinic and gave her a shot of antibiotics. This time he didn't require us to muzzle her but she was leashed and tied to the iron gate with the same man holding the leash. I did see it as progress! These shots were more painful for Baby as she openly cried and ran off when we let her loose. She never attempted to bite anyone and within a few hours came looking for me to get some petting.

My progress to learning the necessary details of getting her home were painfully slow. I would get different answers depending on who I talked to. Many times I was told to call back in 10 min only to call back to a non working number. How does that happen? Remember I was in a country where I didn't speak the language or understand the culture. I had a great deal of difficulty understanding people on the phone as I am sure they had the same trouble with me. I tried to find information on the internet, which ultimately was my primary source, but the internet connection was sporadic at best and terribly unreliable. It was a frustratingly slow process and I had NO help beyond finding the Vet. I was grateful my stay was so long as it gave me a lot of time to do the research. Mind you I was also in treatment for 5 hours a day on average.

Baby's health improved after her antibiotics kicked in and she put on some weight. She, much to my amazement, went into heat. It told me she was no longer dying and going to be okay. I was thrilled.....for a short time. My third nightmare started. All of the male strays in the neighborhood started hanging around the clinic trying to mate with Baby and the dog fights began. I was beside myself. The family had three small children and were clearly afraid of the dogs and I would say with good reason. Fighting dogs are scary and should always be treated with great caution. When I would try and run them off Baby would come out of her hole and attack them. I quickly realized that she was trying to protect me, as I was her!!! It was an awful time. As I was returning from treatment one day Kate came running up to me and said the family had called the dog catcher. CRAP CRAP CRAP. Not that I could blame them but I DID NOT WANT BABY TAKEN BY THE DOG CATCHER! I went back to the clinic and begged them not to let Baby get taken by the dog catcher. I begged all of the staff and anyone else who would listen to me. I assured them that Baby was coming home with me and was no longer a stray nor was she dangerous and she didn't have rabies. One of the family told me not to worry. He said it was the strangest thing but every time the dog catcher was called it seemed the dogs "knew" and they disappeared for a few days until the dog catcher had come and gone. I thought to myself "ya right, your going to let them take Baby". I had put a collar on Baby so that people would know she belonged to someone but I had no illusions that it really would stop her from being taken as she so obviously looked like the other millions of strays. I went to bed sick with worry knowing there was nothing I could do. I tried to get Baby to come into my room with me but she had never been indoors before and would only come up 3 or 4 stairs and then run back down them. She was no where to be found the next morning, afternoon or evening. In fact ALL the dogs were gone. All of them! Not one was anywhere to be found in the community. I was certain that the dog catcher had gotten them. It was terribly sad but I was holding out hope that maybe, just maybe, they were smart enough to leave and come back when the coast was clear. Unbelievably, that is just what happened. After 2 days of no dogs they slowly started to return and Baby was among them!

I continued my attempts to do all that was necessary to take Baby home with me. It was no small task. At every turn I seemed to hit road blocks. I even travelled out to the airport one day in hopes of getting some straight answers only to find they were closed. Come back tomorrow. Well, I couldn't return the following day as I was having tests done that took all day. My time was running out and I didn't have everything I needed. I really wasn't sure at this point all of what I needed. I made it back out to the airport 3 days before my departure. I left the clinic at 9am and didn't get back until 5pm. I was in 3 buildings talked to 9 people and had the car searched once. I finally found a pet handler, who I waited for for an hour. He said "no problem, let me get price for you". I was beyond ecstatic! Maybe this was going to work. He gave me the details of what was required and the price. It looked like I had everything I needed. We made plans for me to bring Baby to his office the morning I was to leave and he was going to take care of the rest. She was to fly on British Airways and come straight into Seattle(my home). All I needed was to find a crate to ship her in the next 48hrs. I returned to the clinic that night over joyed and exhausted. That evening my husband arrived to travel home with me and he met our newest family member, Baby. We set about the next day looking for a crate. To my utter astonishment we were once again....AGAIN having trouble. The listed pet stores on the internet weren't pet stores, weren't open or weren't answering their phones. We tried to get help to be told "to far away" "over 2 hours to get there". I went to the neighbors that had dogs and asked if they knew where we could get a crate. They didn't know what I was talking about and sent me to the local business building where they got their dog food. It wasn't open nor do I ever recall seeing it open in the two months I was there. I was angry and crushed at this point. In a city of over 7 million people I couldn't find a dog crate and no one that could help me would. It meant Baby wasn't coming home with me.

It remains deeply sad to me to recall leaving Baby in India. I had let her down and was sick with worry that she wouldn't survive now that she had been socialized. On top of all of it I was concerned that she was pregnant. The family didn't like one stray dog around. I couldn't imagine what they would do if a bunch of puppies showed up one day. Puppies are adorable by most peoples standards but once they start walking, exploring and chewing things up they aren't quite as cute any more.

I left India with a broken, heavy heart. My hope was that the patients at the clinic had seen that Baby was indeed a friendly dog and would continue to feed her and care for her (they did just that). It was my plan at the time to return to the clinic in 6 months. If Baby was still there I wouldn't leave without her a second time.

When I returned home I couldn't get Baby off my mind. I dreamt about her at night. Sometimes they were nightmares. It was torturous. I told people about Baby and many had ideas that I pursued. They all seemed to come to a dead end. A good friend of mine, whom also loves animals and has 5 dogs, told me about an organization called Help Animals India, which is located right here in Seattle. I looked them up online and sent an email. I never got a response. Like many other roads it appeared to be a dead end. I was haunted by Baby. 


One day, out of the blue, I got an email from one of the staff at the clinic saying "your dog has had 5 beautiful puppies". I was so excited to hear that Baby was alive, that she had given birth to 5 pups and that a staff member was calling them beautiful! I made a plea to the family. I told them I would take the dog and her puppies off their hands. I asked them if they would send me the dogs if I sent a crate and all the information and money necessary. I got NO response. NONE! Needless to say I was beyond furious.. I knew those pups would start to crawl around, chew things, leave droppings and become a nuisance very quickly. I wasn't sure what the family would do. It only made me more anxious about Baby's safety and now her pups as well. 

It seemed my hands were once again tied. My nightmares became worse and I became convinced the only way I was going to get Baby and her pups was to go get them myself. In late October my husband and I decided that was what I would do. As you can tell my husband is an amazing man! I told my good friend again that I was going to go get the dogs and she said "did you try Help Animals India". I told her I would try again. The next morning I sent another email and within 2 hours had about 12 emails from Help Animals India, VSPCA and HSPCA. I must tell you at this point that I am not very computer literate so the first message to Help Animals India where I didn't get a response, could have easily been due to my error. The wonderful people at HSPCA told me "not to worry" that they would go get Baby and her remaining pup. I cried off and on with relief for 2 days following my initial conversations with HSPCA, VSPCA and Help Animals India and I am not a crier! ONE more time I was going to let my hopes get up "that maybe this time I will get her". When finally found HSPCA 3 pups had been killed and 1 had been adopted (amazingly by a staff member at the clinic). But they had Baby and her pup. THEY HAD HER!!!! They were healthy and coming to America(home).

It took another 6 weeks to get the dogs here but arrive they did!!! It was tense up until the final hours of their arrival. We didn't know until the day before what airport they were actually arriving at. First it was Houston. Then it was San Fransico. Then it was Houston again. We tried to get them into the West Coast of the United States as that is closest to us and I didn't want to put them back on another flight. I knew Baby would have trouble being confined as she had been a free creature all of her life. They arrived on Dec 31st, 2011 at Los Angeles International Airport. My husband and I were there to meet them. When I first saw Baby I called her name. She got up looked at me and gave out a deep resounding "Aaauuu" howl. She remembered me! We flew to Los Angeles the morning they arrived, rented a car and drove them 17 hours home to Seattle. Baby hardly left my side....still hardly leaves my side. She slept on my lap the majority of the way home and would growl at her pup if she got to close to me sometimes. I am her human!!! They traveled wonderfully in the car on the way home. I suspect they were worn out from their long, long journey.

The kind, loving, dedicated folks at HSPCA ran into MANY of the same problems that I did when trying to arrange to get the dogs here. It did make me feel a bit better as they spoke the language and yet they had trouble to. It wasn't just me! They were/are also very busy going from one crisis situation to the next. They fed, watched, played with and loved Baby and her pup until they could get them here. For that I am eternally grateful. The "few" horrors I witnessed while in India they see on a daily basis. You have to have a very strong constitution to witness all the abuse day in and day out. They are a tough lot!

We named the puppy Indy. She is a beautiful creature that has no concept of people not liking her or of life being dangerous. She is NOT a street dog. She loves everyone and everyone loves her. We found her a wonderful home in Billings Montana with family friends that have 3 boys that are "over the moon" in love with her.

Baby's adjustment to everything new is wondrous to watch. I have no doubt that it hasn't been easy for her but she is a courageous, scrappy street dog that adapts out of survival. She now lives with 2 male dogs and a 8 year old boy. She clearly prefers the 8 year old boy as he is no threat to her food supply and he seems to know how to play with her. She has an attitude as big as our home and believes that she SHOULD be in charge. The male dogs are going along with that one! She is also a TOUGH lot. My son is still saying "mom, can you believe that Baby made it?" I can believe it! There are just some things in life that are supposed to happen. This was one of them. I thank Baby every night before I go to bed for being strong & brave enough to make the journey and for waiting for me to get to her!

As for me.... I still have cancer but I am taking a lesson from Baby and staying strong and brave. 

THANK YOU HSPCA FOR YOUR DEVOTION........ 


The Fighting Irish
11:40 AM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 1 comments
We are celebrating the STUBBORN in this Red-headed Irish Woman this year and we would like you to join us!


We are celebrating the BEST scan results I have had YET.

On March 16th from 11-2pm please come and celebrate with us. The party is at our house. Just be sure to wear green or you will be fair game for the 8 yr old and the 53 yr old!

I did say the best scan results to date. In January we got back the most recent scans and only two tumors had grown slightly. One of them is .1cm while the other is .3cm. I have never had only two grow and never have they grown so little. I have more than 12 measurable tumors. There is more good news... Two tumors that were measurable on the last three sets of scans, one of them you could actually feel on my neck, are no longer there! GONE... Western medicine is saying they must NOT have been cancerous to begin with. REALLY?? Wrong explanation if you ask me! But they didn't ask me so we are just going with celebrating the RIGHT DIRECTION. That and the Irish seldom need a reason to celebrate. ;)

That said, I remain vigilant in my search for a CURE. I know we have a LONG way to go but my body tells me we are going in the right direction. I physically feel better than I have in 4 years. While it isn't "my old self" it is a VAST improvement. I continue to take my Indian herbs and several supplements. The biggest development, maybe to date, is my niece, Shannon has found that she has a genetic mutation. She has been searching for years on a way to stop what is called "burning tongue". Sounds awful doesn't it? It has been and because of her persistence (a nice way of saying stubborn) she found a naturopath that looked at her history closely and tested her for MTHFr. Shannon was positive for 2 of the mutations, C677T & A1298C. I was with Shanny when she got the results. As the Naturopath gave us the list of problems this mutation is involved in we kept looking at one another. Our extended family's medical history was ALL over this page! 20 of the listed problems our family has/had, INCLUDING breast and colon cancer. Needless to say I went to my Oncologist and had him test me for the mutation. I tested positive!!! I am considered homozygous A1298C. That means neither my mother or my father had this chromosome functioning properly. That means ALL of my siblings are homozygous A1298C and  ALL of our children have a least one A1298C chromosome not functioning. THIS IS A HUGE DISCOVERY! The best part of all of this is that it is treatable, has significant implications and for once it isn't expensive (an AMEN is in order her). I won't bore you with further details and there are many, but I do want you to know this is VERY exciting to me. VERY.

On a different note.

India was indeed easier for me this year. In reflecting back on the experience, with some distance from it, the people made ALL the difference. It was a WONDERFUL group of people with very diverse backgrounds. The folks at HSPCA came through in a BIG way and my fellow patients were warm, bright, interesting and loving. The Raju Family (the docs) are fascinating people. We met many other patients this year that they have healed of one thing or another. They are intrinsically and deeply devoted to their calling, working seven days a week. I imagine I will be returning in 2013.

I will be forever grateful to Angie and Beth, for taking time out of their lives, to make this tough journey with me. The time I have gotten to spend with them, in a strange and foreign place, will live in my memory forever. They made my journey easier and safer. They gave Jeff and my family peace of mind. While they wouldn't tell you this, they did make sacrifices to come and be with me. It did not go unnoticed. AND, YES Beth did manage to bring her Indian street dog home! Her name is Mitha, which means sweet in Hindi. Her name tells the whole story.

This is what I returned home from India to.... He was waiting for me at the airport!


 IT

IS

THE


BEST

FEELING

IN

THE

WORLD!



                            Cole started snowboarding this year and says it is his favorite sport so far. His second lesson he went down a black diamond! He wanted to go down one his first lesson but his instructor said "maybe your fifth lesson we can". I guess they compromised!!  He was SO excited to tell us all about it. In an astonished tone he said "mom did you know it hurts to get the wind knocked out of you?" He was completely undeterred. I have even managed to go up and ski with him a few times. I suspect I will only have this year and next to do this with him as I will "be boring and slowing him down" after that.

Jeff remains the solid, steadfast rock in our family who is ALWAYS putting me and Cole first. My admiration only grows for him as time passes. He is simply a remarkable man. I know I am stating the obvious to those of you that know him and many of you have said these same words to me. He IS the strong silent type and would prefer to stay that way so don't tell him what I said! ;)  He is looking for work and as the economy improves so do the prospects. I believe he is looking forward to having more 'adult conversations' and being back "in the world"! Wish him luck.

My hopes for this year, beyond finding a cure, are to find a way to help and contribute to HSPCA so that I may return the favor of making their lives easier AND to find a way to impart, to all of you, what I have learned about the toxins that exist in our homes and in our bodies. My Oncologist, early on, said he thinks the environment is responsible for the cancers I have. It then became my mission to clean out our home and my body of the pollutants. It was a daunting task for me! After I learned about what I couldn't keep, which was literally EVERYTHING, it became VERY simple, cheaper and easier. Let me save you the trouble of having to learn it all and show you how to get rid of the chemicals. It could save someone's life.

So you can see WE HAVE REASON TO CELEBRATE and we hope you will join us! Please let us know if your coming so we can plan accordingly.

A post script before signing off.... HSPCA asked me to write the story of Baby, our Indian street dog, for their newsletter. I did that a long time ago now but have posted it in the next blog if your so inclined. Hmmm, it seems I have managed to get the blogs switched around so the story of Baby is first.  All I did was change Coles age from 7 to 8. And to think I was so impressed with myself for being able to post pictures! That's what I get.

I hope to see you on the 16th!

Many blessings and GOBS of love,
Mary










More than half way through
10:01 AM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 0 comments
It's true I am more than 1/2 way through!

Today our son turns 8! Happy Birthday Cole Jeffery. He is celebrating by going to a haunted corn maze with Dad, Dana and Jared. Aunt Lorinda and Uncle Ray are stopping by and dinner is with Nanny (Val). When I called him this morning, my time, I told him it was already his birthday in India. He said he wanted to come to India today. Then quickly said "How many days could we celebrate if we traveled around the world?" I told him I wasn't sure but I thought maybe about four days. He said "let's do that".  Think he is my son???

The heart you see was left at my door by a beautiful South African woman! It was her way of saying goodbye. The heart is made out of flower pedals. I hope I will see her again some day. I was very touched.

My treatments continue every day with a new treatment being added about every seven days. One is stopped and another added. They stopped the water torture treatment :) and I started getting Navara. It is boiled red rice, currently in season, put into the cloths I spoke of last time. It is then dipped in hot milk and pounded up and down my body, front and back. It quickly becomes this gooey paste that smells pretty heavenly to me. I think it is my favorite treatment so far. To my knowledge (it could change) I have 10 days of treatment left. I am sad to say that I have lost weight once again but I am looking forward to putting it back on!

Just a few days ago a long festival of 10 days started called Ganesh. The kids are out of school and there are many events/parties around this holiday. I think it is somewhat like Christmas in our country. The park is lit up with lights and there is chanting, over a loud speaker, everyday all day! The women dress in their fancy Sari's and flowers are everywhere. The Raju Family will be hosting some of the celebrations at their house I understand so it all should be interesting. The Italian couple have arrived and have been given permission by a Pundit (like our ministers) to have a wedding on the auspicious day (yes that has meaning) of Oct 25th. We are going to get to see a wedding which is going to be quite the event. It also means good food!

We have had a couple of fun outings with the folks from HSPCA. A few nights ago we went to Samira's moms house had dinner and played TABU. I got to meet the other people that helped get Baby and Indy to the States. I am ever so grateful for having the opportunity to meet them all. They have been such a blessing! We had quite a feast at Priya's (Samira's mom). There were four main dishes, an Arabic dish, a Greek dish, an Indian dish and Cheese Souffle, don't know where that is from! The food was divine and the company delightful. They all speak VERY good English which of course made things much easier for us.

The first day I arrived at the clinic I went over to the building that I see Krishna in and believe it or not I was greeted by a one eyed female dog. No, I am not kidding. Here she is. What do you think the chances of that happening are??? I found her again two weeks later. Her front left leg has been broken and has healed improperly so she walks a bit funny. She is much friendlier than Baby was so she obviously has better experience with the human species. I found it so hard to believe that I had to go find her and take her picture. She looks considerably healthier than Baby did when she was here.

Beth is enjoying herself and finding things to do. Today she was shopping and I know she has a few more of those outings planned. She has fallen in love with a street dog! Shocking isn't it? And guess what? She is bringing her home! As Jeff said, "apples trees grow apples". Well put I think. I am happy she is here with me. It is fun to watch her enjoy this country and who could complain about spending so much time with such a lovely soul.

I am doing fine but ready to be home with my boys and in my own bed. I am sure that also isn't a surprise. Thanks for joining me on my second trip to India.

Happy Halloween to all and much love,
Mary 


Greetings from India
12:15 AM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 1 comments
Well.... Guess what? India hasn't changed! "How bout that?" as my Nana used to say.

It is however MUCH cooler than last year when I was here. Phew! It makes a huge difference. The food at the clinic is served differently now which means I get more to eat. I am determined to not loss weight this year (though I already have). It was hard to get it back on when I returned home.

Everyone at the clinic, with exception of Beth and I, are members of the Transcendental Meditation Movement so the dynamics are similar to our experience last year. There are more folks from other parts of the world this time, but all Maharishi followers. There are people here from Australia, Lebanon, South Africa, UK and Italy. The people from Italy are getting married here at the clinic which will mean we get to see and participate in an Indian wedding.  Beth and I would love that!

A typical day looks like this: I get up, take my herbs and go down to the dining hall to call Jeff and Cole before Cole goes to bed. I have to go to the dining hall because the wifi doesn't work in my room. :( Not terribly private. I then go see the good Doctor for my pulse check. I return to the dining hall for breakfast and then it is off to treatment. The first treatment I always get is called Abyanga. Much like what we would call a message. From then on the treatments change. Sometimes I get Patra Bodli, which is called the "pounding" treatment by the patients. It is eucalyptus leafs sauteed just a bit in oil, wrapped in thin burlap sheets, heated over and over and then pounded up and down the body. This lasts for about 1 hr. Other times I get Shari Shek, which I call water torture. It consists of herbs boiled in water and then poured over the body, for again about 1 hr. I am then released :) to return to the clinic for lunch. We all get about 2 hrs for lunch. Lunch is the biggest meal of the day which is unfortunate as I can't eat a big meal at lunch and then go lay on a wooden slab for the rest of the afternoon. After lunch I get 2 or 3 more treatments. A facial mud pack with honey and rose water in it. Basti's which are placed over your lower back or on your stomach and heart. They fashion what looks like an uncooked doughnut and put it on your skin. They put pearls (yes, pearls) in the doughnuts and then fill the doughnut with warm oil. When the oil cools they sponge it out and pour more warm oil in. This process lasts about 45 min. Then I have Taka dara. It is buttermilk boiled with herbs, cooled and then drizzled over the forehead for an hour. Again I am released to come back to the house for the evening but treatments are not over. Around 8 pm a technician shows up to rub oil into your feet and into the soft spot on your head. Then treatment is over for the day unless you are having a Basti. Different than the one mentioned above and TMI so I won't go into details. Before the night is over I attempt to call my boys again. Then I do it all over again the next day and the next and the next.....

Beth is off seeing the city today, accompanied by Murtuza of HSPCA (the folks that rescued the dogs). I am sure she will have stories to tell. The good folks from HSPCA have bent over backwards to make our stay more comfortable. They picked us up at the airport, got me a refrigerator for my meds, got us an Indian phone so that Beth has access to the clinic when out, have arranged drivers and are checking on us regularly. It makes me feel MUCH better knowing if I need something that there is someone here that will make sure it gets done. We owe them a great deal of thanks as they are all very busy. They all have jobs and in their spare time rescue animals from horrendous circumstances! They are looking for land to start a shelter. Please check out their website at hspca.in. Bless them a million times over.

If you didn't know, when in India, you never wear your shoes into a home. They are always left out by the door. Last night I was in the cafeteria talking with Jeff and I heard a rustle at the door and thought a dog had come to the door. Because I was talking to Jeff I ignored it. I know a few of you are surprised and it was a MISTAKE. I left to come to my room and one of my FAVORITE flip flops was missing. Initially I thought ok, someone is messing with me. Then I thought oooohhhh the dog  that came to the door took it! It is something Baby would do! I looked around a bit to no avail. When I got to treatment this am I told the Tech's that a dog took my shoe. They told me "yes, they take   many patient shoes". I later told Dr. Ganga and she said yes and don't leave your laundry out either. Just recently a dog went up to the 4th floor took a shoe, a blouse and tore all the laundry from the line! My theory is the dogs are exacting revenge on the humans due to the treatment they receive. Or they could just be playing. Either way my flip flop is gone.

To keep my mind busy, sort of, I am attempting to learn Telagu, the language spoken here. The Tech's teach a new word or two every day. They say the word, I attempt to repeat it, they laugh and we try again. I am sure they are laughing with me. Then when I go in to see the good Doc I practice my Telagu. He laughs to! I tried to tell the men that came to fix the Internet (which is spotty at best) thank you in Telagu. They didn't understand me. I repeated it several times before a staff member had the decency to translate for me. One of the men laughed so hard his face turned red. I am undeterred. Today I told the Tech's if I am going to learn Telagu they are going to learn Sign Language so when they teach me a word in Telagu I teach them the same word in Sign Language. They are very good sports.

I have some pictures to share but Beth is gone and I don't know how to do it! I will save them for the next post.

It is easier being here this time though I would still rather be at home with my boys. I am going to live vicariously through Beth's adventures. Next Sat or Sunday Murtuza is going to come and get us and we are going to meet their dog, go the lake with the Buddha in the middle of it and have a meal. I have been out a few times with fellow patients and ridden in Rickshaw's. Those are adventures not to be missed or for the faint of heart. This afternoon we are going to a textile bizarre when we finish treatment. It is fabric from all regions of India. We are excited and I image it will be spectacular. We are going in a "proper car" as our Australian friend says.

The mosquito's are enjoying me and Beth to no end!

Angie everyone has asked about you!

Dreaming of sushi & steak.....

My love,
Mary






India bound.... Again! 9/4/12
10:18 PM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 0 comments
HI HO HI HO its back to India I go......

 I am NOT relishing the thought of returning to India but the latest tests results are hard to argue with, on top of the fact, that I feel better than I have in over three years. My mind has come back (mostly), I can track conversations better and actually accomplish a thing or two! We will take more of all of the above!

 The short version of the test results are: "The results are confusing" says Matt (oncologist). One test says one thing and the other says EXACTLY the opposite. How does that happen? They can't explain it. The oncology radiologist went to get Matt when she read the scans because they just didn't make sense to her. This all made me smile! Western medicine hasn't been confused about anything since this all started so I see it as a good sign. I have a theory about what is happening but it is simply a theory at this point. I ran it by Matt and he said it's possible. One scan is a nuclear medicine scan, highly sophisticated and measures only carcinoid cancer. It says the tumors are shrinking slightly and there is less nuclear activity in the tumors. The other scan is an MRI. It doesn't distinguish between benign or cancerous, it just sees size and location.  The MRI says three tumors have grown slightly and there is one new one! If I were a betting woman and I AM, I am going to go with the nuclear medicine results. I can explain that if your interested but won't bore you with the details here. The results can only point us back to India.

 I leave Sept 24th and return Nov 6th. My oldest niece, Beth, will be accompanying me this year. I had fully planned on going alone this time. When Beth offered to come I tried to talk her out of it, as she is a student at the UW and will have to take a quarter off. She, in her very loving, sweet way informed me that a quarter off from school isn't going to change her job opportunities, her income or her future but when would she EVER get to spend a month with me! She had saved some of her financial aid last year so she could pay for her airfare.... You can clear your throat here, as I did, because what do you say to that? Shut me right up and as most of you know that is not an easy task. Beth is coming with. It suddenly got a lot easier to start making plans to go. Jeff and I are both relieved to have her with me. She has traveled the world, by herself and India won't be as hard on her as it would most people. She will be a wonderful companion. Bless her adorable soul!!

I am not looking forward to going back to India for a whole host of reasons, not the least of which is, I am away from Jeff and Cole for a LONG time. I will miss my sons birthday this year!! UUHH... It is not a comfortable journey and the conditions for this spoiled American are tough. May I just say "I am tired of being a terminal cancer patient. I want to be cured and to have my life back!" That is why I am going back to India.

 As for the rest of the family! Cole started 2nd grade today. Val asked him yesterday if he was looking forward to going back to school and he said "no, not with a bone in my body". Well, that's clear! He was up this morning and ready to go without difficulty however. He also seems to be growing like a weed. The top of his head reaches my neck and he will be 8 in Oct. YIKES.

Jeff started a job in January. He went back to work for a company he had worked for out of HS and into college. I guess there is truth to the saying "you can't go back".  It wasn't a good fit. He quit in May and is in the process of starting his own company. I am really proud of him for quitting because I know he wasn't happy. I also know it had to be hard for him given our circumstances. However if this cancer experience has taught us ANYTHING it is Life is to short to spend it doing something you don't like!

Aunt G, Angie graduated from Bastyr Univ. in May, HOOT HOOT and congrats. She moved into her own place this last weekend. :(  While I am sure it is good for her I will miss her. She has been such a blessing for us these last four years and is a beautiful being. We love you G! Oh, and thank you.

 For those of you not on FaceBook I have to tell you I got my one eyed dog home from India. It was a long arduous task (UNDERSTATEMENT) but on New Years eve Baby arrived with one puppy in tow. We easily adopted her puppy, named Indy, to family friends and both dogs are doing VERY well.  I was able to find an organization in India, through a good friend here (bless you Joyce), that quickly went and rescued Baby and her pup. The people in the org are amazingly dedicated and REALLY know the meaning of rowing upstream. The group is called HSPCA.in. Check them out. One of the nice surprises to this adventure is I have made new, lifelong friends. Beth is going to volunteer with them while we are in Hyderabad so she has something to do. I am looking VERY forward to meeting these dedicated people. They are picking us up at the airport and taking us to the clinic!!!

For those of you that always ask "What can I do to help?" There is a video campaign on Indiegogo at  http://www.indiegogo.com and search for For the love of Mary that will answer the question for you. It will be posted to my FaceBook page and I will send out an email with the link. If some of you could check and make sure that Jeff and Cole are eating while I am gone I would be grateful. Jeff will need a break now and then to! Ha, Cole may need one to for that matter.

One more thing, if you go looking for the website "fortheloveofmary.org" you won't find it. A slime ball organization scooped up the domain name the minute it became available and wanted to charge us to use it!!! There is a special place for them. We REFUSED to pay them so the website is now 4theloveofmary.org

As always, thank you for your continued love and support. The last 3 3/4 yrs (but whose counting) have been made MUCH more bearable with you traveling with us. 

 My love,
Mary




The last India update
12:05 PM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 2 comments
My treatment in India is finished I am happy to announce. Jeff and I are in London for a few days of rest, quiet and eating! Cole is currently in Yakima with his cousins and Angie is at home with the dogs (I think).

I am very sad to say that Baby didn't make it out of India with me. It is difficult to accurately describe the process I went through to try to get her home with me. I really thought I had it when I managed to get the Vet to come to the clinic and give the necessary shots, found the exporter and the price was reasonable. I then had about 24hrs to find a kennel and thought mistakenly how hard can that be? I was unable to find a kennel or a pet store in a city of 7 million people. I know it sounds absurd but I couldn't find one. The places I found on line either no longer exsisted or it wasn't the right number or they hung up on me because I don't speak Telagu and they don't speak English. You would think I could have gotten someone to translate for me wouldn't you? If the street dogs weren't like rats to us I may have been able to. Also, if the Raju family (where I was staying) had condoned my efforts I would have gotten assistance from their "servants" (we call them staff). I was heart broken to leave her there. The night before we left she was more playful than I had ever seen her. She ran to greet me when she saw me and bounced her way back to the clinic. The female doctor, Gonga, at the clinic said she would feed her but I have serious doubts about that. It is common for them to tell you yes about anything and everything with no intention of following through.

I had my scans done in India and like everything else it was an adventure. Angie and I went by ambulance to the imaging facility because it was free that way. It was quite a ride. If you have Facebook I posted a few pictures of the ambulance and a video. They were supposed to pick us up at 6 am. They showed at 8 am. They went to the wrong place and we had to wait for Krishnaji to show up at the clinic to call and find out what happened. We returned to the clinic at 4 pm that day. The tests don't show any reduction in tumor size and there is a now measurable tumor in one of my kidneys. The previous scan showed what they call "nuclear activity", meaning tumors not yet measurable in size, in my kidneys and spleen. I don't know that 40 days of any treatment is really what could be considered a fair shot at a treatment modality. The good doctor has sent me home with some herbs, including the nasty tasting one called smirthi, and a treatment method called Takadara that Angie and or Jeff will have to administer for me. Dr. Krishna wants me to do Takadara for 14 weeks and then have my scans again. We will have to find a way for Jeff and Angie to administer the Takadara, as it is an unusual procedure that Krishna wants me to have on my head and my liver, but we will figure it out!

It is common practice for people to ask Krishnaji when he wants them to return for their next treatment. As I mentioned before people return to the clinic year after year because his results are hard to argue with. I did ask him when he wanted me to come back even though I didn't want to ask or know. He asked me when I wanted to come back? I answered truthfully and said "I don't want to come back Krishnaji. This has been very hard for me. I left my six year old son and husband for 2 months." He said "yes, yes" nodded his head and said "come back in 6 months and bring your family. We find an apartment for them to stay in while you in treatment during the day. At night you can be with them". That is not a common thing to do, in fact they tell you that kids aren't allowed to come. It was an extraordinary offer on Krishna's part. I will tell you I find it impossible to think about right now. It wouldn't be possible for Jeff and Cole to go with me in 6 months as Cole will be in the middle of a school year and hopefully Jeff will be employed by then. The thought of going back to India for another 40 days of treatment is beyond my capacity today. I will think about it LATER. MUCH LATER.

For now it is just nice to be in the company of my loving, faithful husband in a country where I can eat the food (meat), drink the water, speak the language, not have to take malaria pills or worry about mosquito's and to sleep in comfortable bed. Just to name a few things I am grateful for. Oh and my drinks can actually be cold and have ice. I am anxious to see Cole, wrap my arms around him and kiss him until he says "mom STOP", which won't take long I am sure.

On Jeff's journey to India his Cpap (breathing machine) was stolen or scanned in security and not put back into his luggage. When we flew back through Mumbai we went in search for it at the airport. WRONG MOVE! They directed us to another building and we made the BIG mistake of going outside to go to the other building. Once you step outside of building you can't get back in with out a boarding pass and the domestic and international flights are in different buildings. We stepped outside and the WOULD NOT let us back in to take the bus to the international building. We had to take a cab! The first cab we got into (with all our luggage) was VERY strange and when they wanted us to pay before hand I said "NO" and Jeff said "this doesn't feel right, let's get out". We quickly did. It is a good thing there were so many people around. We hauled our luggage back to the front of the building, hailed an employee and said please help us get a cab, which they did. This car was clearly marked like a cab. Forty five minutes and $40 later we were dropped at the international building........ One of the patients I was at the clinic with called things like this "Indian Torture". We left Mumbai 5 hrs ahead of the terrorist attacks!

Have I said yet that I am glad to be out of India? Angie is also glad to be out of India. As for Jeff, he has had to rent a Cpap machine in London, which they would only do for a month, not a week. He to is glad to be out of India!

If the treatment cures my cancer it is certainly is worth every second of seperation, inconvenience, expense and annoyance. If it doesn't, well, we made some new friends, learned a ton of new things and can check one more attempt of the list.

We will be home soon and I look forward to being in touch.

As always my love and gratitude,
Mary


Day 27
4:16 AM - Posted by For The Love of Mary - 0 comments
Greetings from Hyderabad!

Angie arrived safe and sound. It is really wonderful to have her here. The good doctor told me my pulse was strong the last two days. I told him it was because my sister is here now and it makes me happy. He "yes, yes" nodding vigorously. Angie has done pretty well with the jet lag but is getting tired in the late afternoons. Everyone has told me how delightful, wonderful, sweet and beautiful she is. YEP, I know but thanks for saying so.

A few days ago I asked Krishna if he had treated carcinoid cancer before and he said "yes". I then asked if he had cured it and again he said "yes". Naturally I asked how long did it take and he said "it depends". So I tried a few other ways to get my question answered like how many times did they have to come? He said "it depends". Then I tried how long did they stay? He responded "all different times". OK it depends. Later I asked the female doctor, Gonga, if she had seen carcinoid cancer here. She said "yes" and that Krishnaji had in fact cured it! She continued saying Ayurveda cures many things western medicine can not. Now that is what I like to hear.

There are 14 patients here now so the place has gotten busy and more vibrant. Before I started into my next treatment series I asked the good doctor if I/we could go out for a meal. I was dying to eat my heart out! He said yes and recommended where we go. Angie, Ron (an Austrailian patient) and myself went to Film City. A place outside of Hyderabad where they make a lot of films. Did you know that India makes more movies per year than ANY other country? I didn't know that. There are a couple of hotels in Film City and we ate at one of them. It was DELIGHTFUL.... I was a really happy camper all day long. The food was great and we had fun. I managed to take a large bite of what I thought to be a snap pea that turned out to be a chile. The waiter told me what it was after I took the bite. We had cloth napkins and I could not spit it out. Oh man, was that baby HOT. My eyes watered, my nose ran and it would not stop. Of course I thought, great now I won't be able to taste anything. Nothing that disastrous happened. I just had to wait a good bit before I could go on eating but I recovered and went on to enjoy the rest of the meal. We all got a good laugh out of it.

Baby, the one eyed dog, is still with us and thriving. She has created quite a stir as of late. She went into heat and has attracked all of the other stray dogs. Particularly the males but the females have come to. This isn't a good thing. One stray dog was pushing it in this neighborhood. Now there is a pack. There are dog fights in the street and it has made many of the residents unhappy. One of the management called "the dog catcher" because they are getting brave. Baby, now used to being petted, has come looking for Kate and myself which means she is on the Raju Family's property. On the second and third floor. She had one boy dog following her around for several days and he wouldn't let any other dog close. I asked Harish, the family member that called the dog catcher to please not let them take Baby, that she is a good, gentle dog and won't hurt anyone. He said he can't have her laying in the stairwells with patients coming in the middle of the night. I told him I understood but to please not let them take her that I was trying to get her home. My concern was she would be beaten to death. He told me not to worry because whenever someone called it seemed the animals knew and they all disappeared. A funny thing occurred....they all disappeared, including baby. They were gone, gone, gone. You couldn't find any of them in the entire community. I thought they had captured the dogs. Not even close. Baby is back and her buddy comes and goes. I was relieved. Angie brought her a collar so even if they do show up they won't take her. It has been difficult to arrange to get her home. I know what I need to do to have it happen but making it happen in India is a different matter. I did find a pet exporter but he was outrageously expensive. I will keep looking for options and trying to get english speaking people on the phone (a major chore). She is such a sweet girl. I also found dog food for her at the store, which I am sure she has never had. She likes it and now refuses to eat rice. Go Baby!

I am doing well. I would still rather be home but I am feeling good. My energy has really improved and I am walking some, most days. I climb stairs many times a day and can tell it is making a difference. It is great to be feeling stronger. It has been a LONG time since I have felt this way. In theory I have 13 days of treatment left. Theory because the good doctor often changes his mind. I don't expect to be an exception to this. When I am done with treatment I will have the scans done and we will see what, if anything, has changed. One thing I forgot to mention before is Krishna is also an Allopathic doctor. He can call up a pharmaceutical company and get the peptides for me. He also is going to send me to the top Oncologist in Hyderabad and see what he recommends. I have been looking at the nueroendrocrine peptide in greater depth and have found literature that describes the side effects. They aren't good and I can't find out if they are temporary or not. I am hoping the Oncologist can answer that question. I don't know why I didn't think to look at the side effects before, but I didn't. They are significant effects including kidney damage. I won't be doing that if they are permanent.

Not surprisingly, I miss my boys. It is easily the hardest part of all of this. It hurts my heart.

They celebrated my birthday with me here by buying me a cake (thank you Kate) and singing to me. It was very sweet. The cake was one of the best cakes I have ever had and it had no eggs! They put an interesting "candle" on it. It was on a stand and looked a bit like a funnel. You light a red spot in the center of it (with incense of course) and it blooms (or bursts) open lighting six candles surrounding it. It then starts playing 'Happy Birthday'. A musical candle. They told me it would play all night. They had one patient put it in water to shut it up and it kept playing. I left it in the room we had cake in! I went back the next morning and it was indeed still playing. Made in China.

Jeff and Cole celebrated my birthday by having a surprise party for me and Skyping so I could see the party. It was VERY VERY sweet. It did make me a bit homesick but it was wonderful to see everyone there and I know they had a good time. There are pictures of it on Facebook.

I wish you were ALL here with me. It would make it so much easier. And just think of the memories we would have!!!

I am sending my love across the wi-fi and the ocean,
Mary